Stop Winning At Work And Losing At Life

You can be great at your job and still be losing the parts of life that actually make success worth it. That’s where we start: the quiet trade so many high performers make, sacrificing sleep, health, learning, and real presence with the people we love so we can keep delivering, keep getting promoted, and keep looking “fine” from the outside. I share a personal wake-up call that made it impossible to ignore the gap between professional execution and personal neglect.

From there, we lay out the Self First Framework, a plan, commit, execute system built for self-management. We talk about guilt-free future planning to get your goals out of your head and into three clear buckets: meaningful connections, personal growth, and business or professional growth. Then we prioritize using the DAM Matrix so you can start with high impact, low effort wins that build momentum instead of shame. The key is simple: plan without rushing to the calendar, then commit real time to the first small step.

We also get tactical about “not having time.” Most capable people aren’t failing because they’re lazy, they’re failing because they’re overcommitted. I’ll show you how to make your workload visible, then use strategically selfish scheduling with the FIRE boxes to finish what’s urgent, invest in what only you can do, reduce what can be delegated or automated, and extinguish what never needed you. We close with a straightforward daily execution method that helps you track distractions and actually follow through.

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Transcript

Success On Paper, Empty Inside

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I know for a fact you are a, make it er because you wouldn't be here if you didn't know how to like execute on your professional stuff. Navigate all the high complexity relationships and interactions in the workspace. But what about you? How many times have you postponed and delayed? Those things that are really, really important just to you. The challenge is we get super focused, and I'm saying we, because I am one of those people that was just totally, totally hyper-focused on delivering on deadlines, fulfilling all the commitments I made to everybody else, and then all of a sudden. I was not doing well. My like personal relationships with the people, like my special people that I cared about were dwindling and dying on divine my health. Like for real, for real. My health was in the crapper because I was sacrificing sleep to get all the things done to deliver for my commitments and to get my promotions and to get the raises and all of those beautiful things. On the outside. It looked like I Had my stuff in a pile and very successful, but internally I had zero fulfillment or maybe more accurately The only place I could find fulfillment was my job. I went to the doctor. I was 30 years old. I spent my, it was like my twenties and thirties. I spent all my time chasing, accomplishing, achieving, but I was emptying inside. I was lost. Went to the doctor, and the doctor told me, Jesse, you have the complications of a morbidly obese man. I was maybe 15 pounds lighter than I am right now. And it was because I wasn't taking care of myself. So not just physically like health-wise, was I in bad shape, but like inside there, there wasn't a whole lot I had to look forward to except for doing more work and doing more things. And so. If you're constantly like deprioritizing, those super important things that are just important to you, like going to the doctor, pretty simple, but I know it's easy to say. Reschedule, reschedule, learning a new skill, right? Building that new skill or doing some research to start your, your side gig or just expand your awareness. Learn how to play that instrument that you wanna play, uh, being fully present. With your special person, right? Like how many times I say like, you're always busy, you're no pay attention, you're never here. You got a million things on your mind, you work all the time. That is not a good recipe for a long like healthy, thriving relationship. And then lastly, I'll hit it again, sleep, man. Sleep is the easiest thing to deprioritize and get off the list. And here's the thing is, in the moment it feels like I gotta sacrifice all of those things to accomplish these things, and then someday. I'm actually going to do the thing that I've been yearning, longing, hoping, promising to do. if you're in that situation, not alone. Like I said, I've been there and I had to have, I had a reality cheek. Luckily, I had a really close friend of mine point out like, Jess, you got a bunch of goals on there, but. I think that year that you have written behind them is wrong. Like, no, no, no. It's right. That's when I listed out the goals, which was running them. At that time, it was running a marathon, losing 15 pounds, working on the house, like all these little things that nobody really cared about except for me. I made that list five years ago. The problem was I hadn't done anything on them, and then it was like, well, wait a minute. I'm pretty damn successful just like you. I am pretty damn successful professionally in my job at work, but I'm, I'm sucking it up in my personal life. I am failing miserably when it comes to making myself a priority and taking better care of myself. So I said, okay, what if I apply the tools, the methods, the frameworks, uh, that have made me successful pro professionally and apply'em to me? Why? So that I could take better care of myself. Why? Because the more I take care of myself, the better prepared I am to serve the people I care about. And so I started tinkering around and messing around with all the little things that, you know, the little systems I use out there and said, Ooh. I could do this for some future planning. I can do this for my schedule management and actually build myself into my schedule, and then I can identify like the distractions. What are the things that really get in my way from executing not just my work stuff, but that suck up a bunch of time, that keep me from really investing in myself? It's all of that. I spent my twenties and thirties fumbling around and trying to figure it out, and finally kind of accidentally landed on the system. And so the system is the self first framework, which is a plan, commit, and execute system. And I'm gonna give you, slap you, flood you with a bunch of ideas. What I want you to do is take the concept that you think resonates the most with you and start putting it to practice and do it wrong. Do it messy. It doesn't matter, but do the damn thing. Otherwise, you're gonna continue having the same experience you're having and like for real, for real. I don't know how long you've been on this world, but you could tell with my highlights, I got some years on me. The absolute worst thing you can do is look back with regret. And say, dammit, I should have taken that trip. I should have gone on that walk with her. I should have been present with my kids when they were younger. There like that time is not just gonna magically happen. You've got to design it into your operating system, just the same way that you focus and make things happen and deliver for your boss and support your team and all of that stuff. It's the same intensity, the same effort, but now like a specialized system so that you can focus on you. So here we go. So first thing up, I said it a little while ago, but I gotta repeat it just in case'cause I don't want y'all to miss it. This system is a plan, commit and execute system. This is important. Well, or maybe I'll say it this way, full confession This thinking, the breaking it up into three chunks is what helped me. Actually invest real time into future planning, like brainstorming. What do I want my future to look like long term? Now, long term, I'm not saying you gotta have a 10, 15, 20 year plan. Long term can be a week. If you've never planned more than a week, guess what? Planning for a week is a big deal. Brainstorming about what you wanna do, where you wanna spend your time is a heavy lift If you've never done it before. If you're doing a month now, keep doing that. It could be a quarter, it could be a year. The main point is you define what long-term is for you, and when you sit down to do that, that's all you do. You're just brainstorming and planning. once I've dedicated and committed or finished my planning, whatever the time measurement is, I dedicated to it, then I get into scheduling. This was big for me because originally when I would sit down to brainstorm and plan, and if you're going through this, like gimme a thumbs up in the comments. But I would sit down to brainstorm and plan like what do I wanna do in the next six months? Um, and then immediately I had this urgency to like go to my calendar.'cause I use my Outlook calendar to schedule everything and find time to start doing the things. And then I would say, okay, well let me take step number one. So every time I started doing like the long-term planning and thinking about how am I gonna, what do I wanna do? What do I wanna learn? In which direction do I want to grow? I would go into scheduling so what happened was that would short circuit the long-term view, the long-term perspective of what I wanted to learn and accomplish. And so I said, ah, okay. One thing at a time. So when I'm planning, that's all I'm doing is planning. Key point folks. So if you're doing that, just block out time and avoid like just, oh, I wanna put in my calendar, don't worry about it. You're gonna do that, but not yet. Then once we're done planning, then we get into commitment. And what is commitment? Commitment is the scheduling part. Where we take our brainstormed ideas, plug them into the calendar and actually commit time. Now, wanna remind you, this probably sounds very familiar because you probably do some version of this in your day. Job it at your work. It's the similar thinking, except that it's a hundred percent applied to you, to your personal development, growth, and self-care. So once we get into our calendar, then all right, now we have committed time. The challenge then is to actually honor yourself and honor that time that you've committed to yourself, and then track your daily execution. There's no doubt in my mind that you know how to execute and make things happen, otherwise you wouldn't even be listening to me. The main, like the big, big giant value. There's two big, giant value points of like getting really granular on the daily execution. One is so that you can identify your distractions, which we'll talk about here in a little bit, and two, when you actually start rather, I'll say it this way, when I actually started getting super granular on the way that, uh, the, all the different tasks that I do on, on the regular cycle, eventually I was able to see a pattern like a SOP, if you will. That I could automate or outsource. Because I could see the loops or the cycles of the work of the task that I was doing, and then kind of articulate'em in such a way that I could hand'em over to somebody else. And when I can hand stuff over to somebody else, guess what? That gives me more time. I gotta make a confession, right? Uh, this, this, the title of this thing is plan, commit, execute. It's all about time management, but it's not really about time management. It really is about self-management because there's nothing we can do to save time, make time, speed it up, or slow it down. The difference is what do we decide? What decisions do I make? Within the timeframe that we revolve around the sun. If you don't, you know if you're a flat earth or, I don't know, I don't understand that thinking doesn't matter, but the reality is this system is going to force you to get honest with yourself and really evaluate. Are you being intentional with your planning, your decision making, where you focus your, your energy and effort? Are you doing it on purpose or are you living by default? Right? Like are you just letting your calendar fill up and spending all your time and energy doing things that other people ask you or expect you to do? Are you being like straight up, intentional, a good steward of yourself and saying, okay, yes, I'm gonna help other people, but I am going to commit to me and make these investments in myself. That's the problem. That's the challenge. And so we got some feedback from Miss Stephanie. She went through the workshop and she's like, Jesse, this is more than just time management. This is about getting honest with yourself. And it 100% is, uh, I, I may have said it, I'll say it a different way. Time management all the time and energy. People like to spend on managing time. I mean, we got, I, all I need is a watch and I got the sun outside. There ain't nothing I can do to manage time. It is happening. What I need to do is manage myself, manage the decisions I make and where I give my focus and energy, period. And that's the point of the system. now I'm gonna jump into future planning. So if you struggle with like, really thinking long-term and, and ideating and prioritizing where you should start, what you should do first, or when you start like thinking about the future, you gotta get a little anxious because, oh, there's just so many things. There's a million things to do out and you're always like, busy, busy, busy, busy, but you're running, you feel like you're running a hundred miles an hour and not making any progress. Like you're in the same place on a damn treadmill. Pay attention'cause this can help you. So here we go. the first phase, the plan part is the guilt free future planning. And there's three steps here and you can do, you don't need the template, but if you want the template, stay on because I gotta QR code where you can scan the thing and then you can download it and get the deal. Or you can drop double D in the comments. And I'll get you the link so you can get all the templates and all the cool stuff. But the most important thing is the, the, the framework. You can do this on a blank sheet of paper at the house. You can do it on a whiteboard, doesn't matter. the first thing we wanna do, there's three buckets. Business and professional growth, personal growth, and Connections, right? Meaningful connections. Those are the human beings that we care about, that we love. That if you're anything like me that you have neglected for way too long. And so what I want you to do here, all you do is get it all outta your head. What are those things? The wellness things. I wanna lose weight. I want to sign up and get a in, uh, trainer. I want to get a meal prep service. Uh, I wanna read that book, whatever book it is like those personal growth things. That you know you have in your head, but you just haven't taken action on. Or maybe you started them and then you put'em away because you got busy with all the other things. Get that outta your head. Meaningful connections. Are you in a relationship with somebody? And if you are like a romantic relationship. They need all of you. Maybe not a hundred percent of the time, but they need all of you when they do have you. And so how do you commit time? Like what are the things you can do? Take a go on a walk, go, you know, date night. I hear it a lot. This is a common thing that people, uh, talk about when, when we're going through the workshop, they talk about date night, but they don't actually do date night. Or they wanna spend time one-on-one with each of their kids, but they don't actually do that. Like it's someday they wish they hope. So it's those kinds of things in terms of meaningful connections that, you know, like they're really important. You wanna do'em, you just don't have the time to do them. Get it outta your head. And then also, you know, I'll be relaxed with you. I, I try to like say, forget about work because we spend most of our damn time anyways thinking about our careers and our jobs. But it may be beneficial for you to advance in your career when you might need some cert, some new certificates. You may be wanting to start a business. and there's gonna be some new skills, some new learning to be had in order to make that happen so that you can have the, the resources, the financial resources to do the personal growth and to invest in the meaningful connections. So there's a connection there, but I want, I wanna challenge you start with the meaningful connections, then the personal growth, and then the business and professional stuff.'cause we're really good at that. Why do we wanna do that? We wanna do that because when all of these ideas, all of these things just live in our head. They are big, scary, hairy things that kind of like, there's so many things to do. I'm never gonna get anything done. Oh my God. Oh, this guy is falling. Yes, because they're all in our head. But when we get'em out of our head where we can see them. All of a sudden they shrink a little bit. And maybe some of'em are still kind of big, but not, they're not all competing and bashing around in your brain competing for space and time, while you're also dealing with real life right now in the moment. So we get'em out of our head and just look at them big, big step. After we do that, then it's like, okay, these are a lot of ideas. And you know, my mom used to tell me, she said, mijo, you want it all. You want it all right now, you can't have it all. And I said, no, mom. Yes, I can have it all. I just can't have it all at the same time. So I gotta pick, what am I going to have first? And the way I get to that answer is I use the dam matrix and so step number two on the future planning, get all the stuff outta your head and then we start filtering it through I to identify which one of the things is high impact. And low effort. Why high impact and low effort? Because man, I like me some dopamine, I like instant gratification. and the things that I do, the where I want to focus, I have designed my life so that I can focus the majority of my energy on high impact things. I wanna leave this world better than I found it. And I can't do that if I'm jacking around with stuff that's low impact and I have a lot of ideas, and guess what? A whole bunch of them are very, very low impact. And so I gotta filter through to say, okay, which ones are high impact? Why low effort? Because it's easy. Getting small wins early is how we build momentum, right? And so back to the damn matrix, all your ideas that you've dumped out, the goals, aspirations, hopes how, whatever word you need to help you understand that. We wanna run'em through the damn matrix. So if they are high impact and low effort, we're gonna put'em in the D box. If they're high impact and high effort, those are gonna go in the A box. And so anything in the D box we wanna do first. Anything in the A box, maybe start them after we did the D box. And then there's the mbox, which is low impact, but it's still low effort. So it could be an easy win that could have a lot of impact. And maybe it's kind of stepping stone. Maybe we do those after we've taken action on the D box and the A box. And then lastly, things that are high effort, like they're gonna take resources, they're gonna take time. There's gonna be some, you know, some learning, chewing, wrestling with the thing. And, but they have low impact. Maybe we don't want to do them, and there's some special cases where it might make sense. Like, okay, I don't, like, it's not gonna have a lot of impact. It's gonna be a pain in the butt to do, but I gotta get it done. In that case, it, it's fine. Again, if we're optimizing for a momentum, we wanna start with the Dbox High Impact, high Effort. Why? Because Dopamine Baby, we get that hit and we're more off and running and we start getting excited about all our things. We start building evidence that we can actually value ourselves and do impactful things. Without failing on the rest of the stuff, and that's kind of the thing, right? I used to think if I took the time to exercise and sleep seven plus hours a night and build restorative habits and journal that, there's no way. That I would be able to execute professionally. Like for real, for real. That's what I thought. Like if I did all that stuff, that's a waste of time. I would never be able to accomplish the things I wanna do professionally. Turns out I was wrong. It's the exact opposite. The, when I finally actually started dedicating time to me and honoring me and building my skills, I was able to deliver even greater value to at work, to the people I serve, to my clients now.'cause I'm running a business and all that good stuff. And so I know it's hard to believe. But I'm living it, man. So give it a shot now after we've give, run it all through the damn matrix. The next step is to walk the plank and you will get one at a time. Pick all the things in the matrix. My recommendation is the things in the D box go first. And what we're deciding here is what are we gonna do first? What are we gonna do second? What are we gonna do third and so forth? Because you are already committed. You are accomplished, you make things happen. People want your time. You've got all kinds of leverage, like your time is overleverage in the direction of other people. And so what we're trying to do, or what we're working towards is building a system so that you can start. Making space for you and actually committing and delivering for yourself. It's gonna be uncomfortable. It's gonna be challenging, but one thing at a time, man. So once you identify 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, whatever the number is, doesn't matter how you could just do three after you've picked the order, the sequence, then you go and plug that into your calendar. If you use Microsoft Outlook, Google Calendar. If you use like a daily planner, what you do is go to the very next open space in your calendar. Put something in there, dedicate time to it. Now, when you dedicate your time to it, I only want you to think about starting the thing. Like you don't have to complete it. If your big goal, if one of the goals, you know, that you've been neglecting is your, your sleep and you wanna sleep, you know, eight hours a day every day for the next 3000 days, you can't accomplish that in a day. Right? Or work it out if you wanna work out five. Like, I, I wanna get a trainer. I'm not just gonna go get a trainer, I'm gonna do some research, right? I'm gonna look into it, I'm gonna look at some reviews. I'm gonna talk to some people. I'm gonna see what kind of workouts that they do, and then I'm gonna get a trainer. And so the first step would be blocking out 30 minutes, committing 30 minutes to do some damn research on what kind of trainer I want. So that's just a simple example to kind of help you think through, okay, I have this thing, I wanna lose weight. There's a lot of things that are associated with that. Go find some time on your calendar and say, I'm gonna block out 30 minutes, an hour, whatever makes sense for you. Oh, you could do four hours if you want. And if all you do is do some research and think and maybe make a few phone calls and look at their, their email or their websites, that counts.'cause that is one now you're GA, building momentum and then block out another time so you could take another step. This is all about steps and progress, not perfection steps. Progress forward momentum. Get it outta your head, filter it out based on impact and effort, and then go and commit time to do the thing. What you're probably going to find when you go to the, to the calendar and start looking for time, to do these things, to like actually start the things you're gonna find it. Oh my God, I don't have any time. My whole calendar's full. I got a bazillion million things going on, and that's natural. That's, that's all of us. Right now. What you're also probably gonna see is, well, it's just during the day. It's like, yeah, yeah. Well, what about the evenings and the weekends? Right. In some cases, and that's how I started, was man, I didn't have time during the day because I had a real job, and basically my boss and my crew, they ran my day and so I couldn't at that time. I couldn't necessarily commit time during the workday, but I could in the evening, or I could, for me, it was really in the early morning. And so what I wanna suggest to you is like, be flexible and think about your whole schedule Monday through Sunday. You, your, the life that you have right now in terms of where your time is committed and who has access to your time and all that stuff. It, it happened by accident. It is very likely that it, you did not design it that way. You are just responding to what the world is asking and demanding of you, which isn't bad, but you can. Design the life you want and it takes intentional focus. And so when you see that, you go and you're kinda like, oh my God, I got a Brazilian thing. No, I'm never gonna be, it's fine. For some people, I've seen them, they're like, man, Jess, I can't do any of this for three months because my calendar is that booked. I gotta take the kids to the ball game. You know, I got church. I got all like, okay, good. Fine. What you've done is you've booked time three months from now, so guess what? People aren't gonna take that time. You've already committed to you. That's progress. And eventually, I promise you, you'll be doing this on a weekly basis. Like, oh, I got some time. I need to commit to me. All right, so we talked about future planning, committing time to yourself. So now you got into your schedule and, and really, here's another cheat code, um, being productive and efficient and all of those things. It's not about doing more, it's about doing less. And, and I know, I know some people get kind of like, well, what do you mean? Like, I can't, like I'll get fired. Like, I, I know, I know. I, I feel you. Stick with me. Stick with me. you are a very effective person. You know how to make things happen. You've been successful in your life. So a lot of us like to think, we kind of tell ourselves this story that, man, I am not hyper productive. I'm not good. I'm failing at exercise, and I'm failing at relationships, and I'm failing at learning, and you know all the things because I am inadequate. And I'm here to tell you, you are fully adequate and capable. The issue is you are over committed. And you probably don't even know how over committed you are. Which takes us to the selfish strategery. Oh wait, we gotta come. We got a question here from Mr. Renee Dunan. What's up Renee? He says, how often do you do donate these time management nuggets to the world on live streams? Thank you for the question, my brother. Um, every other Saturday. Every other Saturday at 9:00 AM. I do this live stream 9:00 AM central, um, specifically talking about the time management stuff. Today I'm doing a big, high level overview of the whole system. Because I've got a, a batch of workshops coming up and so I just kind of wanna give people a heads up, like, I wanna give you the stuff. You can start doing it by yourself right now. But if you want like in-person hand to hand coaching and guiding through, actually working through the system and starting to design your life, that opportunity is coming up, which we'll talk about more. Uh, usually these Saturday live streams are on a very, very specific topic.. Back to the selfish strategery. And so this idea here about you being over committed, I promise you are. And so here's what I want you to do. Go to your calendar, whatever. Again, whether it's your flippy paper planner calendar, or you use a digital calendar, or you have one on the wall, on the refrigerator, whatever. Or actually some of you I know have a whole bunch of different calendars. You have a work calendar and a home calendar and a personal calendar. All of your calendars, go and get all the things you got there and write down every single thing you have for the next three days. Pick three days and write those things down. Okay? You're probably gonna say, oh, I don't wanna do that. what I want to help you with is to become aware, fully aware of how over committed you are. And after you write down all of the things that are on your calendar, then I want you to write down all the things that you know you're gonna do in the next three days that aren't in your calendar. Picking up the kids, fixing dinner. Doing laundry, mowing the lawn, all those other things that you said that you know somebody's expecting you to do and deliver on. I want you to write those things down too. And if you're catchy, like your, your heart is like palpitating. I understand. And that is just evidence of the fact that you're over committ. You're not incapable. You are 100% an amazing human being that knows how to make things happen. The issue is. We keep saying yes and giving our time away to everything and everybody without recognizing how much like we're overdrawn, man, like you already have on your calendar enough stuff for a 12 hour day, and then you've committed to other things and you can't see it. And so that's the whole thing. Like if you haven't noticed yet. All of this is about visibility. Making it visible so that we can see it. Because when it's in our head, guess what? It's easy to forget things. Oh shit. I said I wanted to go to the party, but dammit, I gotta pick up the kids. Oh, damn. I was supposed to get ready for the birthday party today. I told my wife that we were gonna go, like, there's all these things and then you're scatterbrained, rushing around, frustrated, irritated, and you're not showing up fully present and available to the people in front of you. You're not showing up the way you wanna show up. Cool, calm, and collected because you're over committed and you don't even know. Like I know, you know,'cause you feel it, but you don't know precisely how over committed you are. And so the exercise of writing down all the things that are in your calendar and writing down all the things that aren't in your calendar is gonna help you get a sense of like, okay, damn. Yeah, I got a lot going on. Maybe I need to do something about it. Gimme a thumbs up if that resonates with you. If not, I understand. We, I still got more If you're that person, right? Like if future planning is not a big deal, it's pretty simple. You, you got a handle on thinking long term and you know, plugging it into your calendar, but you find yourself double booked. You got back, you know, multiple meetings happening at the same time. You're rushing around from thing to thing to thing and just praying, oh my God, please, I don't need a flat tire. I don't need any red lights. Because if, if these things don't go as planned, my day's gonna be a disaster. This strategically selfish scheduling will absolutely help you. And so we already talked about really understanding or get a sense of how over committed you are now that you know. what you wanna do. It's not about doing more, it is a hundred percent about doing less. And so how do we figure that out? We go through the firebox F, finish the things first, so anything that is time sensitive. That only you can do, like you're the only human being in the world that can do that. Example, I'm the only human being in the world that can get the sleep that I need to get. That's kind of an important thing. It's not urgent until I'm sick, right? It's not urgent until I'm falling asleep behind the wheel. But it's a, it's an example of a thing that only I can do. So anything that is like urgent time sensitive has to happen within the next week or so. And can only be done with me. Of all those stickies that you put over here in that little commitment box, we're gonna put those in the F box. Why? Because they are time sensitive. And we're gonna finish those first. We're gonna figure out how to get those damn things done. Then go through your little list over here in that commitment box. And anything that, again, can only be done by you. And I want you to, uh, this kind of gets people off center sometimes. I just want you to like really, really be a little bit selfish and think about like, for real, for real. Does it have to be me? let's just use it as a filtering box.'cause if you don't, if you think like, well, sure, I mean, I don't have to do it, but I do have to do it because if not my, you know, whoever's gonna be mad at me or whatever. Like, I get that. But right now,, this is a thinking exercise for us to broaden our mind and more importantly. To identify some things, one or two things that we can start working to get off of our list. But if you're worried about people's expectations and you're worried about, uh, the consequences of them being mad at you and judging you and all of that other mess, guess what? Everything has to be done by you and you'll never make any progress towards building the bandwidth so that you can focus on you. So you have permission from me right now to be selfish and only think about you and forget about everybody else. And then after the call, you could go do whatever you want. Do it the way you always do it. That's perfectly fine. Again. Urgent, is it time sensitive? And are you the only human being that can do this? If it's not urgent and it's you're the only person, then it goes into the I box and this focus here. And here's the key to the whole thing this is something you might wanna write down if you don't know what you're optimizing for. If you don't clearly do not have the answer of what you would do if you had more time, why the hell are you doing any time management anyways? Because if you don't have a clear direction, objective answer to the question of what would I do if I had more time? What's going to happen is you're gonna do all these things, time blocking and all the other mess that everybody talks about. You're gonna get more efficient and the only thing that's gonna happen is that new time that you exposed is gonna fill back up with other crap. How do I know? Because I've lived that life. The idea is. What are the important things that I need to focus on? And guess what? If you did the guilt-free future planning, you have the answer. You have a bunch of answers. And so the idea is when we find time, we're going to dedicate and commit that newly found time to these important things to help us grow and develop so that we can better serve the people in front of us. That's the whole damn point. And another thing, all these things that are like, only I can do. That are not time sensitive right now. When I ignore them, I promise you they are going to become super time sensitive. I talked about earlier being in my thirties and the doctor telling me that I am, uh, morbidly obese and I had the, rather, I had the complications of a morbidly obese 60-year-old man. All of a sudden, sleep, nutrition and exercise became super damn urgent. It took me a couple years. A complete lifestyle change for me to get back to. Good. Uh, and so that's the point. I'm neglecting sleep. I'm neglecting exercise. I'm neglecting my relationships. I have a bunch of exes. Why? Because I didn't give them the time that I should have. And when they finally said, Hey, dummy, like, you need to start changing, or else it was too late. It was too, it was, the damage was done. I couldn't recover from that. And so folks, these are the things we're talking about here, your personal relationships, your personal health. And other stuff. Okay, so here's where we're gonna figure out like how to, what are we gonna do? How are we gonna make time? So anything that that is time sensitive, but absolutely does not have to be done to by you. Somebody in the universe can do it. Uber Eats could do it, right? All these kinds of things. Put that in the R box. What we wanna do is reduce those. Sure, it's time sensitive, but you don't have to do it or somebody else could do it. That's another way to look at it. Put those in the R box. What we wanna do with those things is we wanna optimize'em, whatever they are, automate'em or delegate'em. now, I know a lot of people think like, oh, I can't do all of that. Like it's okay. All we're doing is sorting at the at. When you're done, you can throw it all away and just keep living the way you're living. That's okay. Right now all we're doing is sorting, so just put'em in the box that you feel they belong in. And then the last box is the E-box, which is the things that anybody else can do. It doesn't have to be you, and it's not time sensitive. Anything that lands in that box, we want to extinguish them. We wanna like fi find a way to kill them and get'em off of our calendar. Why? Because we want to invest. Time and effort on the things that only I can do that are meaningful and fulfilling, that are gonna help me grow and better serve the people around me. And so after you do that, what I want you to do is pick two things. One in the R box and one in the Ebox. The one thing that you pick in the R box. And really think about how can I automate or delegate this thing? How can I make it smaller? How can I make it simpler? Put some, it's gonna take a little extra effort, right? You're gonna have to put some time and effort to figure out how to delegate it or automate it, but it's gonna give you your time back, on the back end. You're gonna invest a little time here, but then after you figure it out and shrink it down to size and reduce it all that time, every time you've done that, once a week, twice a week, whatever it was, you start getting that time back. So start brainstorming on that and then pick something in the ebox. The question is this, how can you outsource it? Can you outsource like groceries? I do this every week. I adopted this over a year ago, and I'll never go back. I order my groceries through an online service. They pick the stuff, they deliver it to my house. Guess what? That gives me three hours back every single week. 52 weeks. That's 156 hours. I've been doing it almost two years. That's 332 hours that I got back. More importantly, the energy that I've conserved. I go to the grocery store, I get frustrated and irritated for a whole bunch of reasons. So that energy, negative energy is gone. I've taken it out of my week and I get to focus it on important things and be here and have fun with you guys on this live, live stream. So pick one thing that's in the ebox. Can you outsource it? Can you have a conver? Can you ask for help with the thing or can you just like, what steps do you need to take to just completely stop doing that damn thing? And that is how we're going to create space to focus on the things that only we can do. Our special beautiful gifts and talents that we've been blessed with. We wanna spend as much of our time and energy there, but we have all these other things that other people could do. We are doing, and we just need to figure out how not to do that anymore. Uh, all right, so we got, ooh, we got the, the James Gable, the Uncommon Communicator. He says Clarity is often the problem in getting stuff done. How do you accomplish what you're not even sure you're shooting for a hundred percent, man. Thank you, bro. Like, for real, for real clarity. I know it feels or sounds like this, you know, super fancy philosophical thing. Getting the crap outta your head and putting it in front of you so you could see it counts as clarity. And then picking, what do I wanna do first? What do I wanna do? Second? Guess what? That's another measure of clarity. Getting damn clear, like knowing these are the four or five things I wanna spend more time on, and if I had more time, I'm gonna spend time on this thing. That's clarity. You're making decisions, you're doing life on purpose, and that's what we want to do because it's gonna bring you fulfillment. But more importantly, when you're pouring and investing in yourself, you will become a better version of yourself, and that benefits everybody around you. That's why this whole thing is so important to me. All right, man, I'm talking too much. So once we've done the planning, we've done the scheduling, we've done some schedule management to identify and clear things off of our plate, then we get into daily execution. And so here's a QR code. Take out your phone, scan that QR code if you want the Daily Domination template. And real quick, I'm super high level. I'm not gonna get all into details here because you can get'em in the workshop, right? There's four columns, squirrel, cage to do, doing, done. You know, there's a particular way to use this. And guess what? This template, there's already pre-populated cards in each of the cards. There is instructions. So for example, set yourself up for success. Step number one, click on that thing. You can read it. It gives you instructions, and there's even a link to a YouTube video of yours Truly getting into the dirty details of what that looks like. And so again, you can see, watch all of those little videos one at a time. The template is already made, so all you gotta do is say, you know, create the template. It'll get into your Trello. It's a free thing. You don't have to pay for this. Uh, you can download. Also, when you sign up for this, you're gonna get the template, the the Guilt free Future planning template, and the selfish s. But on the Trello board, you just put that into your thing. You might have to create a account if you don't already use Trello, which is not a big deal. Uh, and you'll have all the cheat codes, all the instructions on how to do all the things. So you can get, like, go back to it and, and, and take it into like bite-sized chucks. Uh, so that's there for you. Or again, if you, if you want like special delivery, drop double D in the comments. and, and I'll DM you or find a way to get you the link. Maybe you don't wanna scan the QR code. I get it. Not a problem. some people might be thinking, well, sure, time management or, or this, this self first framework is necessary because you're an old dude. You're, you're almost a boomer, Jess. Like, okay, possibly. I, I mean, I understand the thinking, but like. Had I had this system back when I was like the young hotshot and like early in my role, eager and just working and burning and grinding this system would've helped me be more effective and more intentional. Right? Like James said earlier, I would've had more clarity and I wouldn't have been, dumping time around, uh, that wasn't gonna have a long-term impact. Also, I know, I know a whole bunch of y'all out there. The primary reason that you don't have time to take better care of yourself is because you're so damn busy taking care of everybody else. And I applaud you like you're my kind of people. I love the givers. But if you don't start taking care of yourself, guess what? You ain't gonna be helping nobody. And so if you're in that situation, this system will work for you. Then there's a bunch of us that, you know, that we've been through. We've made it, we, we've had some impact our careers, we've hit the goals. Things are kind of cool, and now we want to give back and start building a legacy and contributing into other people. But how the hell do I do that? How do I start that? This will work for you too. So if you know anybody like that or if you got people on your team that fall into those buckets. They could benefit from some time management, AKA self-management. Send them my way, send them the links.'cause we can help'em, right? We can help'em have a way more fulfilling life and more importantly, they, we can help them. I can help you have more impact on the people you care about. Starting with you. I'm gonna start with you all the time, every time. Um, and yes, I'm talking about this stuff because I love it. I lived it. I've been doing it for a long time, but I ain't the only one that's been through it. Uh, here's some testimonials, Ms. Jennifer Lacey says, it forced me to stop and break things down into smaller components, clarity. Mr. Craig says, I want to get the most out of every day. This workshop gave me the tools to do that. Aha. and then Ms. Megan said the biggest value was the mind shift. It wasn't about the tools, it was about approaching time management differently, and that is 100%. The goal is to give you a shift, a shift in your thinking, so that you could change your lenses, your perspective on how yourself, your time, your commitments. So that you can better serve yourself. The biggest shift is making yourself a priority. Now, if you're excellent at making yourself a priority and you're hitting all your goals and you're loving life, don't even worry about it. Like you're good. Just send me your cheat codes.'cause I could, I wanna add, I always wanna add, and if you're worried about like, oh my God, I gotta do this thing perfectly, or like, that's not true. Everybody that has been the wor, we've had over a hundred people now that have been through this workshop. None of'em do it exactly the way I teach it. And that's important because it's not the tools that make the difference, it's the thinking. So some people, all they really needed was that daily execution thing, and the rest of the stuff they done forgot about it. But man, they're kicking butt. They're increasing their credibility because they're delivering regularly on their commitments. That's a big deal. Some people, they like, they have really big ideas and they start all these things. They start all these fires all over the place. And then they don't execute and fully deliver on them. Well, what did they need? They needed the weekly planning or the schedule management. Strategically selfish scheduling. And so that's the only thing they focused on. They're using different formats. I use Mural, my calendar and Trello. Uh, Jordan is using, he's got two different, uh, journals and he uses his calendar so it fits, like the idea is get the thinking and apply it to your life.'cause that's the most important point and that's the way it works best. Oh my goodness. We got another comment from James. He says, wow, such truth. You have to take care of your first to be able to help others. It's like when you're on the airplane. Yep. And they instruct you to put on your oxygen mask first before helping others. And if y'all didn't know, I know you don't know. I'm just gonna announce it. Mr. James Gable over there with CoBuild, they are bringing me in to go through this whole workshop with their entire team, which I know is a, for me it's impressive, amazing, and exciting because they're bringing their people offline. To invest in themselves. The company is making that investment. So if you ain't working for that kind of boss, call James, he can hook you up. Uh, but more importantly, if you, or maybe on another note. If you have a team, this workshop do with a person. I'm headed to Dallas tomorrow to do two sessions with Tally Riggins. You already saw. I'm gonna be doing it with co build here in the near future. Just yesterday, I was, where was I? I was in Kansas City doing it with JE Dun. So if you want the in-person version of the workshop, hit me up. If you want a private virtual version of this, hit me up. And. If you just wanna sign up for like the online workshops that we got coming up, hit me up and so you might be thinking, okay, so what is all the whole full experience? I just wanna say this first. If you got something that can help you so far in all of the stuff that I've been gibber jabbering about, start doing that. If you want the templates, again, drop double D in the comments, scan the q rewind and scan the QR code and you'll get all the templates. You don't have to pay anything for that. Start using those things, put'em into practice. If you get stuck, you got a question, DM me. I will happily help you if you want, like hands-on, hands-on, get into the detail, learning with the group, brainstorming, asking the questions, kind of making sure you're on the right path. My recommendation is you sign up for the full workshop, oh, we got my brother Lance. Lance says, I've been listening in the car and can finally tap Vista. So folks, y'all don't know this, but this whole workshop it's his fault. He asked me one time, this was over a year ago. Hey Jess, how do you do all the things that you do? Do you have a system? I was like, I don't know if I have a system, but this is what I do. And I walked him through the way I kind of do my long-term future planning and my, my scheduling and my daily. He's like, dude, you got a system. I'm like, what? He's like, yeah. I'm like, oh. And then we talked about it with another group, blah, blah, blah. So, Lance, I wanna appreciate you, bro, for like, asking the question and giving me the time or, or the grace to put up with my crazy, messy brain. Uh, because that's where it, this all started. the whole damn point of this whole thing, my mission, my goal is to leave the construction industry better than I found it. But I can't do it all by myself. I need help. I need accomplished forward thinking. Make it ERs like you to help me with that. And this is why I share the kinds of things that I share. The kind of services and training is so that I can help you take better care of yourself, because I know that when you take better care of yourself. You are going to better serve the people around you. And through all of us doing that together, this beautiful, amazing community, we can actually leave this world better than you found it. There's the QR code again, we want more details like all the registration. Go registrar, online, whatever you need to do. Do the scanning, do the thing, uh, or more appropriately, do the damn thing. I appreciate you guys. If you're out there like my brother, Lance is still doing it all to also, he's still doing all the the things, bro. I love that. I love hearing that. Thank you man. keep taking care of yourselves out there. Again, you already know you got questions you wanna know about the workshop. You want the templates. Get the templates are free, man. Just, well, not totally free, I get your email address. Um, but you can get the templates and start putting those things to work. Use what makes sense. Scrap the rest. Do the damn thing.